Sun Aug 15, 2010 3:31 am
From Chris Eisenman - For Posterity - My Story
Hello All! I promised to give a more complete story some day, so here it is. I posted this a few days ago at ESMB, now it's your turn!
Thank you for the opportunity to be heard!
_______________________________________________
I have come to another crossroads.
In 2003, my wife and I left Scientology forever, and it’s been one of the most rewarding decisions we have ever made as a couple. Soon after, our three children followed suit, not because we forced them to, but because we became transparent about out actual experiences which, coupled with their own became more than enough for them to seek their own way. Life became livable once again, we had a future to plan and work on that precluded the million dollars it would take to get the family up the dreaded “Bridge to Total Freedom”. We could breathe, relax, and think again.
Now, in 2010 we have a completely different and blessed life. We live with community and friends helping tend a Sustainable Living Demonstration Farm in the California desert. Our children, almost all adults now are following a path dictated by who they are and what they are interested in instead of dogma. We are looking at a very busy next couple of years building toxic free natural homes for all of us to live and work in.
I have counseled several people since 2003 who sought me out, looking for someone who would verify what they already knew, Scientology was not The Way. All I had to offer was the truth of my personal experiences, nothing more, and they left for greener pastures as well.
I am disheartened by the Headly’s Court case outcome, but not surprised. Caveat Emptor, or, let the buyer beware. It is our own personal responsibility to know what we get ourselves into, as well as get ourselves out. I feel I must at least tell our story for the next person who gets involved or considers doing so.
So here is a short story. I have told it to many people who wanted to know, and let them make up their own minds about it. I can only offer the same to you.
The Beginning
Around age 10 or so, my uncle Dan came to us a changed man, so I am told. He had alcohol abuse problems, which had been remedied by the Purification Program at the Ft. Lauderdale Mission. My father, a journalist/writer of sorts was intrigued and decided to look into it. The young receptionist was quite intimidated upon discovering my father was not only a journalist and a writer, but had also been in Army Intelligence! These are all red flags to Scientology, but somehow my father calmed them down and got involved. The fact that Scientology was discriminating against media/intelligence types was apparently not a red flag for my father, he jumped in with both feet.
Initially it all looked pretty rosy. We became Miami Org “parishioners” and my parents set to work converting us kids with my father spending many hours teaching Dianetics Auditing. In fact, he had dozens of people trained and sent to the Miami Org monthly for quite a while Most of his training was paid for this way. The immediate downside was we rarely saw him anymore. He was either working or at the org. The only way to spend any substantial time with him was to get audited by him.
Touch Assists, Dianetics, Study Tech, blah blah, blah. Looking back, I only did all that because my parents said I needed to. Sure, they gave me a choice, but it was clear what they expected. Left own my own I had comic books, the Hardy Boys, friends to visit. But from their perspective I had study problems, was a slow student, introverted, meek, etc. I quickly learned to fall asleep during Dianetics and touch assists. Even though I had a demo kit in my school desk, I was the only kid in the entire class that had one, and only used it when the large teacher ambled up to my desk and asked, “You using that demo thing your parents said to use?” I was already in Special Education, and having a demo kit in a public elementary school didn’t upgrade my status much.
This being the early 80’s orgs were booming and raking in the dough. Major events were actually celebrated with real alcohol and even dancing! Everyone wanted to go to the parties, even me! I was only 11 or 12, but it was great fun. They were never held at the org because too many people came!
It wasn’t meant to last. I had no idea what was going on, but now we know the Finance Police were about to wreck it all. What I do know is soon my mother decided to disconnect from her best friend, Judy Rivera since she had become the dreaded Squirrel. My parents continued preaching the gospel to us, and soon I was dutifully spending time on course, first in the basic course room, then full time in the major course room. Spending your summer days from 9 am to 10 pm in a course room was not really what I wanted to do, but I consented. I would never to that to my kid now.
Since I had so much trouble as a student, but the Student Hat was too much for me, I was given the option to go to the local “get mugged for free” High School in Coral Gables, or Delphi. That was a really tough choice. Home schooling, Unschooling, etc. were not options they considered, or at least, weren’t offered. It was impressed upon me that they would be spending $30,000 a year to send me to Oregon for my benefit, and I had only better go if I really was going to take advantage of it. Not wanting to be beat up everyday at school, I readily agreed, despite the fact I didn’t want to leave home at age 14.
I spent 2 years at Delphi, which did very little to improve my education skills. Delphi is a scaled down Scientology Org. Kind of a prep school for future Scientology do gooders. The brightest time there was learning the sport of fencing, the only education I was interested in, but they didn’t have it the first year. Of course, they neglected to mention that until I was in the auditorium waiting to sign up for it. Clark Carr, now the head of Narconon International, was not available for some reason. The second year Clark taught fencing, but only for a few months before telling us he had decided to join the Sea Org. After learning this, I had zero reason to go back to Delphi.
The Sea Org Beckons
Now back at home for summer vacation, I find myself in the home kitchen talking to Big Brother Hans, a Delphi Graduate, and Jose, my future brother-in-law who had been sent on mission to get Hans to the CMO CW. Hans was to become a Commodore’s Messenger, how grand. I could see his ego inflating as we spoke about it. I figured it must be pretty important position and I was happy someone wanted him for such a fine job, whatever it was.
Then they both turned their attention on me. Would I like to join the CMO? I could see why they wanted me now. It’s pretty obvious. I was undereducated, had a study problem, 16 years old, clueless, had no ambition, and no idea what the Sea Org was except they wore navel uniforms and seemed to command respect. I was perfect! Of course, any rational organization would say, get educated, get a point of view, and when you can prove you are worth a grain of salt we’ll think about letting you join us, maybe…
But what I really was, how it all really came down, I would be a bonus. Not only would Hans be brought in as a statistic, I would be the icing. I could get started right away! I had zero sexual, drug, & work history! I was a clean slate! Neither of them considered my interests other than to forward the general dogma that if it’s good for Scientology, of COURSE it’s good for you!
The EPF
Off to Clearwater I went. Hans came some time later since he still needed replacement in Miami. My parents were promised that I would be able to complete my High School education, verified that I really wanted to join, and signed me off. I signed the Billion Year contract in Miami, and was promised I would be able to work alongside Hans in construction projects while I did my EPFs. In reality, once at Flag I was a maid, and still had study problems. If they had an ounce of sense I would have been offloaded and told to come back when I could actually study.
I did the EPF, which took way too long, and then the CMO EPF. Once finished there I became the Treasury Secretary for the CMO, since Hans, who had already finished his EPF’s in record time was holding that post due to the fact the previous occupant had a mental breakdown and went Type 3. Hans turned the post over to me, telling me what he knew about it from the two weeks he held the post, and there I was. By now I had a girlfriend, Edith, who would later become my wife. But first was High School! The other messengers who were attending the school gleefully explained to me that the school was a complete joke. They laughed how the kids would climb through the window to get to roll call in time and that they just fooled around all morning. They also told me that since I was 16, I didn’t have to go. I decided to take my chances in the regular course room and never went to the faux High School. No one really followed up on the promise to my parents. My father later mentioned that they didn’t want to appear CI (Counter Intention) to my joining the SO, it might get them in trouble.
I held the Treasury post as best I could for 3 years. I don’t think anyone was willing to take the post over despite the fact math was my worst subject and I have dyslexia. During this time I married Edith, I was 17 at the time, and almost exactly a year after we married we had Erik, our firstborn son. Since having children was now verboten, we had to be shipped off to a Class 5 org, then the new protocol. We never considered leaving staff since we didn’t want to be labeled as degraded beings and pay a freeloader debt. Of course, the first place “they” considered sending us to was Miami, my old stomping ground. Since my parents were now in Puerto Rico, working to pay for their OT levels, we had no family there anymore to help us start our lives as a family. Edith grew up in Mexico, and we didn’t want to go there. Edith’s parents were also working at Flag, so they couldn’t help. Edith’s brother, who recruited me to the SO was now in New York. Hey, that’s perfect! So we were sent to New York City with a newborn. Actually, since Edith’s birth was a complete surprise to everyone, including us ( a different story) she was suddenly off post and at home, now completely unproductive in the eyes of the SO. I had to turn over my post which took a month to do. Edith was shipped off to the CLO EUS pronto, and it took me a month to get there. The very first night Edith was in the CLO EUS building, she was relocated from her small, awful smelly and cold room (it was January, 1988) to a worse room so a missionarie could take her slightly better room. Her brother was too busy to be able to help much.
I finally arrived and we spent the next two years scraping money together just to eat. During this time we both put in 80-100 hours a week, lived in 3 different apartments, made an average of $250 combined income a week, with our average expenses around $620 a week. My first paycheck was $5 for a full weeks work. We were the only couple working full time in the NY Day Org. All the other non-SO staff had a spouse working full time real jobs to support the other in the org, plus they had all been in rent controlled apartments for years. What they would pay $400 for, we had to pay $1200, and that was a great deal in Manhattan. We felt trapped. By now Edith was pregnant with Victor, and Matt Henderson, the then CO CMO CLO EUS strongly suggested she abort. Edith of course, refused while pointing out in Dianetics what Hubbard said about abortion.
We should have left staff but the stigma was too much, plus I had no education to fall back on, Edith’s entire family was in the SO, and my parents had no money AND were on mission staff. Looking back, we could have blown and stayed with my grandparents, who were not Scientologists and didn’t like it much, but that would have caused a lot of trouble for them and my parents. We spent a month homeless and living/working in the org until we were found out and ordered to find a place to live or else. We ended up living in John Carmichael’s apartment, taking over the lease for $1200 a month. My parents had to borrow money (from my future inheritance) to pay 6 months of rent to keep us in the apartment. After we were looking at the second 6 months of back rent and an eviction notice we decided that was enough. Edith would go to Miami to find work, along with her parents who had been unceremoniously kicked out of Flag for being illegal’s, and I would stay to route out in NY.
It took six months to route out, Nate Jessup was the ED then, and he kept trying to get me to stay. I was threatened with an SP declare since I wouldn’t report to the org to work, as I was trying to make some money to live. Interestingly, once they realized they could arrange a loan to pay off my freeloader debt of $6000 or so, that routing form was completed real quick. I arranged to get my Security Check outside of the org, and bam it was done. Pat Luefan loaned the money, and it was arranged that I would work for him until it was paid off. Of course, I was only worth about 7 bucks an hour. I later figured out that it would take 2 years to pay Pat off while my wife had to go it alone in Miami. At least she had her parents to help. I told Pat the agreement was unworkable, and I would have to find some other way to pay off the debt, which many years later, I did pay off completely. I stayed with a friend who paid for my ticket to Miami.
Edith was staying at the house I grew up in, on Key Biscayne, FL. My parents were trying to sell it and we were able to stay for a few months. We couldn’t afford the mortgage on the house, since I’m sure my parent’s needed the considerable money the house would make for them to go OT. The house is now worth $780,000, so in the early 90’s it was probably around $150 - $200,000.
So we stayed in Florida for several years, assuming a mortgage and losing it in foreclosure, barely making ends meet all the while. We were too busy raising the kids and working to do much of anything else. Finally, we moved back to Clearwater so we could stay with my parents in their new big house, which we did for a year. They bought another house and we paid them rent. Eventually, we received several thousand dollars over time from my grandfather from my inheritance. We squandered a bunch of it in bad investments (a fool and his money) and on Scientology. Mace Kingsley got about $30,000 so they kids (now 3 of them) could get a jump start on their indoctrination. I tried a bunch of MLM’s and offered Edith a chance to do nothing but ballroom dancing for a year. It gave us some room to breathe. I also realized then the money for Delphi and the back rent in NY came from my future inheritance! So I had paid for it all along. .
Eventually, we ended up living next door to my parents, who were by now both on OT7. Dad had a stroke several years before while auditing on OT5, right during the session. He had trouble using an entire side of his body. He has mostly recovered since then, but it seemed like a red flag to me. Either way, my parents became our self imposed FSMs and were constantly trying to get us up the Bridge. I did some course time in the Mission but was mostly focused on how to make enough money to pay for all of it.
Around this time, 24 years into my Scientology experience, I had a realization. I had been involved in Global Prosperity Group, another MLM type scam involving offshore accounts, pure trusts, and selling bogus information. As a result of following this information I had not filed a tax return for 7 years. This was now backfiring in that the people who trafficked the information were now going to jail, and I was looking at a potential audit. After kicking myself for being a moron, once again, for the umpteenth time the realization slowly set in. I really was a moron. An utter MORON for letting other people, who I assumed were smarter than me, tell me what I should do! I was not taking responsibility for myself and the information I was depending on. I was taking all the risk in following the advice, but not verifying it at all! Crap!
The Beginning of The End
So after getting control of my IRS dilemma, I took a long hard look in the mirror and told myself I was a moron and I would never depend on other people to tell me what to do, think, or spend my money on. I asked myself, what other area’s of my life have I been depending on other people who want my money/time/energy?
It came down from above, in a big blue sign with bright blinking lights…
SCIENTOLOGY
Damn It! Talk about a crossroads. I had decided I was now after truth, no matter where it took me, no matter the cost. I knew I was risking my relationship with everyone I knew, wife, kids, parents, 2 brothers, friends, etc. Fine. It was better than being fed bullshit and left in the dark. I already knew what it felt like to be a mushroom, I doubted it could get any worse.
Heart pounding, I launched into a research project that would take about 6 months. Google became my dear friend, my guru of information that I would used to get, verify and reconcile what I had experienced and what others said. I decided while using “Guruoogle” I must discard what could not be verified, consider what matched my experience, and read all those bits I wasn’t supposed to. It took me three months get the nerve to read OT 3, learn about Xenu, all that malarkey. I didn’t get sick, not even a cold.
After those 6 months, Edith said something that gave me hope I could get her in the boat with me. I casually mentioned that I had my doubts about Scientology and what it purports to accomplish, even though I was already out. She said she did too, and I found she had been out for years but was afraid to tell me! I said THANK GOD! We decided to do nothing in Scientology for a full year as an experiment to see if our life fell apart, and immediately felt a huge weight lift off our shoulders! Then we went to see a movie, a real date in the real world at last. After being married for 16 years we finally felt free to set our own course as a couple.
We came up with a plan that took 2.5 years to get us out of Florida, and several years after that would completely end our involvement in Scientology. I spent another 6 months researching our options, figuring that other people must have been in our situation and what did they do that worked? We came up with a plan…
First, we realized our biggest asset was also our biggest anchor. The house had to go. We sold it, eventually, to my parents for a profit of $80,000. The market had just begun to tank, despite the “fact” that property values could only go up forever, Clearwater being the “center of the universe” and Scientologists would flock to Flag to do auditing/training and buy up every available house on the market. My parents took out a loan to buy the house for $250,000, $7000 less than someone else offered me and about $100,000 below the supposed market price. Now the house is valued at $155,000.
Now that we had $80,000, we paid off all our debts, credit cards, everything. Edith arranged to work from the road, we bought a fifth wheel travel trailer, a truck and sold almost everything we had. By August 2006, we had moved out of the house and we were on the road. The boys opted to stay in Clearwater, so it was Edith, her mother our daughter and myself. We all cheered after we crossed the state line, making our way to my first volunteer gig in North Carolina, ready to lean about Natural Building. We had $20,000 to sustain us for a year, no mortgage, no debts, and hopefully a bright future as we drove into the unknown.
We did have a few hiccups. Our plan was to leave the state, get established in our new life and then let the family know we had no intention of continuing in Scientology. It seemed rather unlikely to us that my parents or brothers would leave, we had our kids out, and we were content with that. Telling them ahead of time seemed foolish as we lived next door and it would only get awkward. So for 2 years we had to skirt the issue, no easy task as it appeared they were quite intent on getting me in session. I suppose I seemed a bit antagonistic about Scientology, and if asked I told the truth about my experience in the Sea Org to my parents. I didn’t realize this, but my Dad was now off OT 7 because I was apparently not with the program. Of course, neither of my parents would just ask me if I was out or in, only indirect questions were asked. So much for confront. “When are you going to get auditing? Are you going to the event? Would you like Dad to audit you for free?” Bleh…
It was here our little IRS snafu came in really handy. It took two years to fully straighten that out, plus $6000 bucks. Since I was refused auditing at Mace Kingsley based on the fact I had not filed my returns for 7 years, I now had an easy out! All I had to do was mention I was on an IRS handling and everyone backed off. It was wonderful! If asked an indirect question, I replied with a truthful but indirect answer. People hear what they want to hear. This fell apart the day Hans, who had moved to Clearwater with the wife and kids from California asked me to come over and help him with a leaky pipe.
The Hans Handling
Of course, Hans has known me all his life. I have noticed a common thread in our relationship. When Hans talks to me, it’s because he either knows what’s best for me, has a great business venture/investment, or is trying to handle me. Guess which one this was?
So, 2 hours or so later, the repair is done his wife and kids “went for a walk” and Hans puts out the bait. Would I like to go with him and Christine as a double date to the IAS Event? Hmmmm…I said no. I probably should have just left at that point but Hans keeps asking questions. Why not? Now we get into a long discussion about how the last IAS event I went to was in Miami when Jeff Pomerantz came into our course room and told us no one was leaving until they anted up the dough. Edith and I had to go to work, we were both on the night shift and decided to pay early while the amount was still low at $350. That was all of our rent money, but to leave without paying puts you on the shitlist and we didn’t have time for that. We were still good little monkeys then.
Hans is still pulling the string, certain he is going to find the Sherman Tanks that will lead to the inevitable conclusion on my part that I must race up the Bridge, pronto. Eventually he leads up to, “Chris, either you are in, or you are out!”
By now I am tired, it’s late, and I should have said. Damn Hans, you are soooo right, I am totally going to follow your advice! And then left without telling him a thing. But no, I am really riled up now and I say,
“FINE! I am OUT, Edith is OUT, the boys are Out we have been for 2 years!”
Hans’ jaw is now on the ground. Apparently this was not the answer he was looking for. Whoops.
I then spent 2 more hours with him trying fruitlessly to recover me. Of course I am now on solid ground having two years to cure my decision to leave while observing the ever clearer picture of what Scientologists look like to regular people. Curiously, Hans’ wife and kids are still out on that walk! Hmmmmm
Hans keeps pushing that my eternity is at stake, yada, yada, yada. I disagree and finally, since this was not what I came over to do, and was brought over with false pretenses I get up to leave. I tell him I am hungry and tired, and I’m going home. This doesn’t seem to sit well with him, and he gets angry at me. Up to this point all I have done is politely tell my story. Nothing about internet information, just me and what I have seen for myself. I figured that was enough! I forget what Hans said to me at this point, but it doesn’t matter. It wasn’t friendly, and he called to apologize that night.
Even though it had just turned a bit ugly, I almost always responded to phone calls and spent the next 8 months visiting Dad next door to answer his questions about why I left the only solution in the sector of the Galaxy.
After all that talk, several lies about how they aren’t trying to handle me, audit me, interrogate me they finally say. “Chris, just go live your life!” Which is exactly what I was trying to do until they were ordered to handle me.
What should have happened in my estimation is: “Oh Chris, we are sorry to hear you don’t want to be a part of Scientology anymore, but that is your right and choice, and we stand by that. Please let us know if we can help you on your new path in any way.”
But that didn’t happen. It’s not my fault it didn’t happen that way. I would have kept my mouth shut except for Hans and the unknown Ethics Office forcing my parents to pump me for information. What they didn’t realize is I used this time to tell my parents the story they didn’t want to know, but had to find out. Perhaps some day they will realize I was telling the truth, but I think it will be on their deathbed.
I don’t blame them, they were forced into handling me just so my Dad could audit through OT7. The policies and technology they have subscribed to, paid money, blood sweat and tears for was now out of reach, just because little ole me didn’t want to be a part of it anymore. Too bad, so sad. If the tech is that vulnerable, maybe it’s not so workable? Something to think about.
All I have done is tell the truth when asked, I stopped being a liar when I left Scientology and didn’t have to sugar coat the truth anymore. If Scientology is uncomfortable with that, I suggest they treat people decently and fairly so the truth sounds more palatable to others. Of course, their policies don’t allow for that, do they?
Many events have occurred since that day in 2003, and the above is just the quick version as I didn’t want to bore everyone to tears. Here’s a few highlights.
* I was the Best Man at my twin brother’s wedding in Jan 2004.
* Sept 2006 left Fla and began our new life.
* March 2007 found our new home.
* August 2008 I received a Disconnection Letter from my Parents and brothers. Registered mail, etc.
* Jan 2009 receive an email parents want to get back together with us, no explanation offered, we accept.
* End of Jan 2009 Parents and twin brother visit the farm, love the place, stay a week, still no explanation as to why they reconnected. Twin brother visits several times with his wife.
*Back in touch with all but Hans. Email pictures and small talk, but I don’t feel safe talking to them. I always have the feeling it’s just getting reported to someone I don’t know, and they aren’t being truthful about how they feel, etc.
* Dec 2009 I am posting on Ex-Scientologist websites and friend all Ex-Scientologists I can find on Facebook.
* May/June 2010 All contact with brothers and parents, etc. cease. I find out I have been declared a Suppressive Person due to Marty Rathburn, whom I befriended on Facebook as soon as I found him online. I have never even talked to him, nor do I want to. I just wanted him to know he’s not alone.
My intention is to leave this story behind for posterity. Someday, my brothers four children are going to wonder what happened, and when they go looking, they hopefully will find this, and know that we still love them, and it’s okay if they don’t want to be in Scientology anymore. It’s also okay if they do, we don’t have a problem either way.
Lastly, I feel I should be clear about a few items.
I have no issue with anyone deciding to pursue Scientology. Knock yourself out. I just think you should be an informed consumer.
I hope my Scientology family finds what they are looking for, whatever it is. I hope someday you can allow me the same without also considering me some kind of criminal bent on attacking all the time.
I have left out all kinds of details here. I am quickly covering 30 years of my life, and there is a lot left unsaid here, for better or worse. I may have the time line a little off, some of the memory is a little hazy from being too young or having too little sleep, etc.
If you are family, or someone who finds this offensive I apologize. It is not meant to harm anyone. If I sound bitter, I probably am, and I’m working on it. We all do what we have to in order to better our lives. Sometimes we have to agree to disagree. It’s not about being right or wrong.
I understand why my family is treating me this way. I didn’t expect much else. I love them anyway, I’m just really disappointed in them, and I’m sure they are disappointed in me. Not much I can do about it.
I have no intention of forcing anyone to do anything.
If I can figure it out, I’ll post the disconnection letter and the Freeloader Debt receipt, and anything else interesting.
I have yet to see a copy of my Suppressive Person Declare.
After this post I may not post much anymore. I have gotten to a crossroads where I want to focus on building the future. I felt a deep desire to communicate this story for others to know what they are getting/have gotten into. Please don’t take it as the only truth. Find the truth within yourself, take full responsibility for yourself. Examine everything, discard what doesn’t fit for you. Have the courage to say NO when you need to. You’ll be okay, really, you will!
Good Luck to you all,
Chris Eisenman
Thank you for the opportunity to be heard!
_______________________________________________
I have come to another crossroads.
In 2003, my wife and I left Scientology forever, and it’s been one of the most rewarding decisions we have ever made as a couple. Soon after, our three children followed suit, not because we forced them to, but because we became transparent about out actual experiences which, coupled with their own became more than enough for them to seek their own way. Life became livable once again, we had a future to plan and work on that precluded the million dollars it would take to get the family up the dreaded “Bridge to Total Freedom”. We could breathe, relax, and think again.
Now, in 2010 we have a completely different and blessed life. We live with community and friends helping tend a Sustainable Living Demonstration Farm in the California desert. Our children, almost all adults now are following a path dictated by who they are and what they are interested in instead of dogma. We are looking at a very busy next couple of years building toxic free natural homes for all of us to live and work in.
I have counseled several people since 2003 who sought me out, looking for someone who would verify what they already knew, Scientology was not The Way. All I had to offer was the truth of my personal experiences, nothing more, and they left for greener pastures as well.
I am disheartened by the Headly’s Court case outcome, but not surprised. Caveat Emptor, or, let the buyer beware. It is our own personal responsibility to know what we get ourselves into, as well as get ourselves out. I feel I must at least tell our story for the next person who gets involved or considers doing so.
So here is a short story. I have told it to many people who wanted to know, and let them make up their own minds about it. I can only offer the same to you.
The Beginning
Around age 10 or so, my uncle Dan came to us a changed man, so I am told. He had alcohol abuse problems, which had been remedied by the Purification Program at the Ft. Lauderdale Mission. My father, a journalist/writer of sorts was intrigued and decided to look into it. The young receptionist was quite intimidated upon discovering my father was not only a journalist and a writer, but had also been in Army Intelligence! These are all red flags to Scientology, but somehow my father calmed them down and got involved. The fact that Scientology was discriminating against media/intelligence types was apparently not a red flag for my father, he jumped in with both feet.
Initially it all looked pretty rosy. We became Miami Org “parishioners” and my parents set to work converting us kids with my father spending many hours teaching Dianetics Auditing. In fact, he had dozens of people trained and sent to the Miami Org monthly for quite a while Most of his training was paid for this way. The immediate downside was we rarely saw him anymore. He was either working or at the org. The only way to spend any substantial time with him was to get audited by him.
Touch Assists, Dianetics, Study Tech, blah blah, blah. Looking back, I only did all that because my parents said I needed to. Sure, they gave me a choice, but it was clear what they expected. Left own my own I had comic books, the Hardy Boys, friends to visit. But from their perspective I had study problems, was a slow student, introverted, meek, etc. I quickly learned to fall asleep during Dianetics and touch assists. Even though I had a demo kit in my school desk, I was the only kid in the entire class that had one, and only used it when the large teacher ambled up to my desk and asked, “You using that demo thing your parents said to use?” I was already in Special Education, and having a demo kit in a public elementary school didn’t upgrade my status much.
This being the early 80’s orgs were booming and raking in the dough. Major events were actually celebrated with real alcohol and even dancing! Everyone wanted to go to the parties, even me! I was only 11 or 12, but it was great fun. They were never held at the org because too many people came!
It wasn’t meant to last. I had no idea what was going on, but now we know the Finance Police were about to wreck it all. What I do know is soon my mother decided to disconnect from her best friend, Judy Rivera since she had become the dreaded Squirrel. My parents continued preaching the gospel to us, and soon I was dutifully spending time on course, first in the basic course room, then full time in the major course room. Spending your summer days from 9 am to 10 pm in a course room was not really what I wanted to do, but I consented. I would never to that to my kid now.
Since I had so much trouble as a student, but the Student Hat was too much for me, I was given the option to go to the local “get mugged for free” High School in Coral Gables, or Delphi. That was a really tough choice. Home schooling, Unschooling, etc. were not options they considered, or at least, weren’t offered. It was impressed upon me that they would be spending $30,000 a year to send me to Oregon for my benefit, and I had only better go if I really was going to take advantage of it. Not wanting to be beat up everyday at school, I readily agreed, despite the fact I didn’t want to leave home at age 14.
I spent 2 years at Delphi, which did very little to improve my education skills. Delphi is a scaled down Scientology Org. Kind of a prep school for future Scientology do gooders. The brightest time there was learning the sport of fencing, the only education I was interested in, but they didn’t have it the first year. Of course, they neglected to mention that until I was in the auditorium waiting to sign up for it. Clark Carr, now the head of Narconon International, was not available for some reason. The second year Clark taught fencing, but only for a few months before telling us he had decided to join the Sea Org. After learning this, I had zero reason to go back to Delphi.
The Sea Org Beckons
Now back at home for summer vacation, I find myself in the home kitchen talking to Big Brother Hans, a Delphi Graduate, and Jose, my future brother-in-law who had been sent on mission to get Hans to the CMO CW. Hans was to become a Commodore’s Messenger, how grand. I could see his ego inflating as we spoke about it. I figured it must be pretty important position and I was happy someone wanted him for such a fine job, whatever it was.
Then they both turned their attention on me. Would I like to join the CMO? I could see why they wanted me now. It’s pretty obvious. I was undereducated, had a study problem, 16 years old, clueless, had no ambition, and no idea what the Sea Org was except they wore navel uniforms and seemed to command respect. I was perfect! Of course, any rational organization would say, get educated, get a point of view, and when you can prove you are worth a grain of salt we’ll think about letting you join us, maybe…
But what I really was, how it all really came down, I would be a bonus. Not only would Hans be brought in as a statistic, I would be the icing. I could get started right away! I had zero sexual, drug, & work history! I was a clean slate! Neither of them considered my interests other than to forward the general dogma that if it’s good for Scientology, of COURSE it’s good for you!
The EPF
Off to Clearwater I went. Hans came some time later since he still needed replacement in Miami. My parents were promised that I would be able to complete my High School education, verified that I really wanted to join, and signed me off. I signed the Billion Year contract in Miami, and was promised I would be able to work alongside Hans in construction projects while I did my EPFs. In reality, once at Flag I was a maid, and still had study problems. If they had an ounce of sense I would have been offloaded and told to come back when I could actually study.
I did the EPF, which took way too long, and then the CMO EPF. Once finished there I became the Treasury Secretary for the CMO, since Hans, who had already finished his EPF’s in record time was holding that post due to the fact the previous occupant had a mental breakdown and went Type 3. Hans turned the post over to me, telling me what he knew about it from the two weeks he held the post, and there I was. By now I had a girlfriend, Edith, who would later become my wife. But first was High School! The other messengers who were attending the school gleefully explained to me that the school was a complete joke. They laughed how the kids would climb through the window to get to roll call in time and that they just fooled around all morning. They also told me that since I was 16, I didn’t have to go. I decided to take my chances in the regular course room and never went to the faux High School. No one really followed up on the promise to my parents. My father later mentioned that they didn’t want to appear CI (Counter Intention) to my joining the SO, it might get them in trouble.
I held the Treasury post as best I could for 3 years. I don’t think anyone was willing to take the post over despite the fact math was my worst subject and I have dyslexia. During this time I married Edith, I was 17 at the time, and almost exactly a year after we married we had Erik, our firstborn son. Since having children was now verboten, we had to be shipped off to a Class 5 org, then the new protocol. We never considered leaving staff since we didn’t want to be labeled as degraded beings and pay a freeloader debt. Of course, the first place “they” considered sending us to was Miami, my old stomping ground. Since my parents were now in Puerto Rico, working to pay for their OT levels, we had no family there anymore to help us start our lives as a family. Edith grew up in Mexico, and we didn’t want to go there. Edith’s parents were also working at Flag, so they couldn’t help. Edith’s brother, who recruited me to the SO was now in New York. Hey, that’s perfect! So we were sent to New York City with a newborn. Actually, since Edith’s birth was a complete surprise to everyone, including us ( a different story) she was suddenly off post and at home, now completely unproductive in the eyes of the SO. I had to turn over my post which took a month to do. Edith was shipped off to the CLO EUS pronto, and it took me a month to get there. The very first night Edith was in the CLO EUS building, she was relocated from her small, awful smelly and cold room (it was January, 1988) to a worse room so a missionarie could take her slightly better room. Her brother was too busy to be able to help much.
I finally arrived and we spent the next two years scraping money together just to eat. During this time we both put in 80-100 hours a week, lived in 3 different apartments, made an average of $250 combined income a week, with our average expenses around $620 a week. My first paycheck was $5 for a full weeks work. We were the only couple working full time in the NY Day Org. All the other non-SO staff had a spouse working full time real jobs to support the other in the org, plus they had all been in rent controlled apartments for years. What they would pay $400 for, we had to pay $1200, and that was a great deal in Manhattan. We felt trapped. By now Edith was pregnant with Victor, and Matt Henderson, the then CO CMO CLO EUS strongly suggested she abort. Edith of course, refused while pointing out in Dianetics what Hubbard said about abortion.
We should have left staff but the stigma was too much, plus I had no education to fall back on, Edith’s entire family was in the SO, and my parents had no money AND were on mission staff. Looking back, we could have blown and stayed with my grandparents, who were not Scientologists and didn’t like it much, but that would have caused a lot of trouble for them and my parents. We spent a month homeless and living/working in the org until we were found out and ordered to find a place to live or else. We ended up living in John Carmichael’s apartment, taking over the lease for $1200 a month. My parents had to borrow money (from my future inheritance) to pay 6 months of rent to keep us in the apartment. After we were looking at the second 6 months of back rent and an eviction notice we decided that was enough. Edith would go to Miami to find work, along with her parents who had been unceremoniously kicked out of Flag for being illegal’s, and I would stay to route out in NY.
It took six months to route out, Nate Jessup was the ED then, and he kept trying to get me to stay. I was threatened with an SP declare since I wouldn’t report to the org to work, as I was trying to make some money to live. Interestingly, once they realized they could arrange a loan to pay off my freeloader debt of $6000 or so, that routing form was completed real quick. I arranged to get my Security Check outside of the org, and bam it was done. Pat Luefan loaned the money, and it was arranged that I would work for him until it was paid off. Of course, I was only worth about 7 bucks an hour. I later figured out that it would take 2 years to pay Pat off while my wife had to go it alone in Miami. At least she had her parents to help. I told Pat the agreement was unworkable, and I would have to find some other way to pay off the debt, which many years later, I did pay off completely. I stayed with a friend who paid for my ticket to Miami.
Edith was staying at the house I grew up in, on Key Biscayne, FL. My parents were trying to sell it and we were able to stay for a few months. We couldn’t afford the mortgage on the house, since I’m sure my parent’s needed the considerable money the house would make for them to go OT. The house is now worth $780,000, so in the early 90’s it was probably around $150 - $200,000.
So we stayed in Florida for several years, assuming a mortgage and losing it in foreclosure, barely making ends meet all the while. We were too busy raising the kids and working to do much of anything else. Finally, we moved back to Clearwater so we could stay with my parents in their new big house, which we did for a year. They bought another house and we paid them rent. Eventually, we received several thousand dollars over time from my grandfather from my inheritance. We squandered a bunch of it in bad investments (a fool and his money) and on Scientology. Mace Kingsley got about $30,000 so they kids (now 3 of them) could get a jump start on their indoctrination. I tried a bunch of MLM’s and offered Edith a chance to do nothing but ballroom dancing for a year. It gave us some room to breathe. I also realized then the money for Delphi and the back rent in NY came from my future inheritance! So I had paid for it all along. .
Eventually, we ended up living next door to my parents, who were by now both on OT7. Dad had a stroke several years before while auditing on OT5, right during the session. He had trouble using an entire side of his body. He has mostly recovered since then, but it seemed like a red flag to me. Either way, my parents became our self imposed FSMs and were constantly trying to get us up the Bridge. I did some course time in the Mission but was mostly focused on how to make enough money to pay for all of it.
Around this time, 24 years into my Scientology experience, I had a realization. I had been involved in Global Prosperity Group, another MLM type scam involving offshore accounts, pure trusts, and selling bogus information. As a result of following this information I had not filed a tax return for 7 years. This was now backfiring in that the people who trafficked the information were now going to jail, and I was looking at a potential audit. After kicking myself for being a moron, once again, for the umpteenth time the realization slowly set in. I really was a moron. An utter MORON for letting other people, who I assumed were smarter than me, tell me what I should do! I was not taking responsibility for myself and the information I was depending on. I was taking all the risk in following the advice, but not verifying it at all! Crap!
The Beginning of The End
So after getting control of my IRS dilemma, I took a long hard look in the mirror and told myself I was a moron and I would never depend on other people to tell me what to do, think, or spend my money on. I asked myself, what other area’s of my life have I been depending on other people who want my money/time/energy?
It came down from above, in a big blue sign with bright blinking lights…
SCIENTOLOGY
Damn It! Talk about a crossroads. I had decided I was now after truth, no matter where it took me, no matter the cost. I knew I was risking my relationship with everyone I knew, wife, kids, parents, 2 brothers, friends, etc. Fine. It was better than being fed bullshit and left in the dark. I already knew what it felt like to be a mushroom, I doubted it could get any worse.
Heart pounding, I launched into a research project that would take about 6 months. Google became my dear friend, my guru of information that I would used to get, verify and reconcile what I had experienced and what others said. I decided while using “Guruoogle” I must discard what could not be verified, consider what matched my experience, and read all those bits I wasn’t supposed to. It took me three months get the nerve to read OT 3, learn about Xenu, all that malarkey. I didn’t get sick, not even a cold.
After those 6 months, Edith said something that gave me hope I could get her in the boat with me. I casually mentioned that I had my doubts about Scientology and what it purports to accomplish, even though I was already out. She said she did too, and I found she had been out for years but was afraid to tell me! I said THANK GOD! We decided to do nothing in Scientology for a full year as an experiment to see if our life fell apart, and immediately felt a huge weight lift off our shoulders! Then we went to see a movie, a real date in the real world at last. After being married for 16 years we finally felt free to set our own course as a couple.
We came up with a plan that took 2.5 years to get us out of Florida, and several years after that would completely end our involvement in Scientology. I spent another 6 months researching our options, figuring that other people must have been in our situation and what did they do that worked? We came up with a plan…
First, we realized our biggest asset was also our biggest anchor. The house had to go. We sold it, eventually, to my parents for a profit of $80,000. The market had just begun to tank, despite the “fact” that property values could only go up forever, Clearwater being the “center of the universe” and Scientologists would flock to Flag to do auditing/training and buy up every available house on the market. My parents took out a loan to buy the house for $250,000, $7000 less than someone else offered me and about $100,000 below the supposed market price. Now the house is valued at $155,000.
Now that we had $80,000, we paid off all our debts, credit cards, everything. Edith arranged to work from the road, we bought a fifth wheel travel trailer, a truck and sold almost everything we had. By August 2006, we had moved out of the house and we were on the road. The boys opted to stay in Clearwater, so it was Edith, her mother our daughter and myself. We all cheered after we crossed the state line, making our way to my first volunteer gig in North Carolina, ready to lean about Natural Building. We had $20,000 to sustain us for a year, no mortgage, no debts, and hopefully a bright future as we drove into the unknown.
We did have a few hiccups. Our plan was to leave the state, get established in our new life and then let the family know we had no intention of continuing in Scientology. It seemed rather unlikely to us that my parents or brothers would leave, we had our kids out, and we were content with that. Telling them ahead of time seemed foolish as we lived next door and it would only get awkward. So for 2 years we had to skirt the issue, no easy task as it appeared they were quite intent on getting me in session. I suppose I seemed a bit antagonistic about Scientology, and if asked I told the truth about my experience in the Sea Org to my parents. I didn’t realize this, but my Dad was now off OT 7 because I was apparently not with the program. Of course, neither of my parents would just ask me if I was out or in, only indirect questions were asked. So much for confront. “When are you going to get auditing? Are you going to the event? Would you like Dad to audit you for free?” Bleh…
It was here our little IRS snafu came in really handy. It took two years to fully straighten that out, plus $6000 bucks. Since I was refused auditing at Mace Kingsley based on the fact I had not filed my returns for 7 years, I now had an easy out! All I had to do was mention I was on an IRS handling and everyone backed off. It was wonderful! If asked an indirect question, I replied with a truthful but indirect answer. People hear what they want to hear. This fell apart the day Hans, who had moved to Clearwater with the wife and kids from California asked me to come over and help him with a leaky pipe.
The Hans Handling
Of course, Hans has known me all his life. I have noticed a common thread in our relationship. When Hans talks to me, it’s because he either knows what’s best for me, has a great business venture/investment, or is trying to handle me. Guess which one this was?
So, 2 hours or so later, the repair is done his wife and kids “went for a walk” and Hans puts out the bait. Would I like to go with him and Christine as a double date to the IAS Event? Hmmmm…I said no. I probably should have just left at that point but Hans keeps asking questions. Why not? Now we get into a long discussion about how the last IAS event I went to was in Miami when Jeff Pomerantz came into our course room and told us no one was leaving until they anted up the dough. Edith and I had to go to work, we were both on the night shift and decided to pay early while the amount was still low at $350. That was all of our rent money, but to leave without paying puts you on the shitlist and we didn’t have time for that. We were still good little monkeys then.
Hans is still pulling the string, certain he is going to find the Sherman Tanks that will lead to the inevitable conclusion on my part that I must race up the Bridge, pronto. Eventually he leads up to, “Chris, either you are in, or you are out!”
By now I am tired, it’s late, and I should have said. Damn Hans, you are soooo right, I am totally going to follow your advice! And then left without telling him a thing. But no, I am really riled up now and I say,
“FINE! I am OUT, Edith is OUT, the boys are Out we have been for 2 years!”
Hans’ jaw is now on the ground. Apparently this was not the answer he was looking for. Whoops.
I then spent 2 more hours with him trying fruitlessly to recover me. Of course I am now on solid ground having two years to cure my decision to leave while observing the ever clearer picture of what Scientologists look like to regular people. Curiously, Hans’ wife and kids are still out on that walk! Hmmmmm
Hans keeps pushing that my eternity is at stake, yada, yada, yada. I disagree and finally, since this was not what I came over to do, and was brought over with false pretenses I get up to leave. I tell him I am hungry and tired, and I’m going home. This doesn’t seem to sit well with him, and he gets angry at me. Up to this point all I have done is politely tell my story. Nothing about internet information, just me and what I have seen for myself. I figured that was enough! I forget what Hans said to me at this point, but it doesn’t matter. It wasn’t friendly, and he called to apologize that night.
Even though it had just turned a bit ugly, I almost always responded to phone calls and spent the next 8 months visiting Dad next door to answer his questions about why I left the only solution in the sector of the Galaxy.
After all that talk, several lies about how they aren’t trying to handle me, audit me, interrogate me they finally say. “Chris, just go live your life!” Which is exactly what I was trying to do until they were ordered to handle me.
What should have happened in my estimation is: “Oh Chris, we are sorry to hear you don’t want to be a part of Scientology anymore, but that is your right and choice, and we stand by that. Please let us know if we can help you on your new path in any way.”
But that didn’t happen. It’s not my fault it didn’t happen that way. I would have kept my mouth shut except for Hans and the unknown Ethics Office forcing my parents to pump me for information. What they didn’t realize is I used this time to tell my parents the story they didn’t want to know, but had to find out. Perhaps some day they will realize I was telling the truth, but I think it will be on their deathbed.
I don’t blame them, they were forced into handling me just so my Dad could audit through OT7. The policies and technology they have subscribed to, paid money, blood sweat and tears for was now out of reach, just because little ole me didn’t want to be a part of it anymore. Too bad, so sad. If the tech is that vulnerable, maybe it’s not so workable? Something to think about.
All I have done is tell the truth when asked, I stopped being a liar when I left Scientology and didn’t have to sugar coat the truth anymore. If Scientology is uncomfortable with that, I suggest they treat people decently and fairly so the truth sounds more palatable to others. Of course, their policies don’t allow for that, do they?
Many events have occurred since that day in 2003, and the above is just the quick version as I didn’t want to bore everyone to tears. Here’s a few highlights.
* I was the Best Man at my twin brother’s wedding in Jan 2004.
* Sept 2006 left Fla and began our new life.
* March 2007 found our new home.
* August 2008 I received a Disconnection Letter from my Parents and brothers. Registered mail, etc.
* Jan 2009 receive an email parents want to get back together with us, no explanation offered, we accept.
* End of Jan 2009 Parents and twin brother visit the farm, love the place, stay a week, still no explanation as to why they reconnected. Twin brother visits several times with his wife.
*Back in touch with all but Hans. Email pictures and small talk, but I don’t feel safe talking to them. I always have the feeling it’s just getting reported to someone I don’t know, and they aren’t being truthful about how they feel, etc.
* Dec 2009 I am posting on Ex-Scientologist websites and friend all Ex-Scientologists I can find on Facebook.
* May/June 2010 All contact with brothers and parents, etc. cease. I find out I have been declared a Suppressive Person due to Marty Rathburn, whom I befriended on Facebook as soon as I found him online. I have never even talked to him, nor do I want to. I just wanted him to know he’s not alone.
My intention is to leave this story behind for posterity. Someday, my brothers four children are going to wonder what happened, and when they go looking, they hopefully will find this, and know that we still love them, and it’s okay if they don’t want to be in Scientology anymore. It’s also okay if they do, we don’t have a problem either way.
Lastly, I feel I should be clear about a few items.
I have no issue with anyone deciding to pursue Scientology. Knock yourself out. I just think you should be an informed consumer.
I hope my Scientology family finds what they are looking for, whatever it is. I hope someday you can allow me the same without also considering me some kind of criminal bent on attacking all the time.
I have left out all kinds of details here. I am quickly covering 30 years of my life, and there is a lot left unsaid here, for better or worse. I may have the time line a little off, some of the memory is a little hazy from being too young or having too little sleep, etc.
If you are family, or someone who finds this offensive I apologize. It is not meant to harm anyone. If I sound bitter, I probably am, and I’m working on it. We all do what we have to in order to better our lives. Sometimes we have to agree to disagree. It’s not about being right or wrong.
I understand why my family is treating me this way. I didn’t expect much else. I love them anyway, I’m just really disappointed in them, and I’m sure they are disappointed in me. Not much I can do about it.
I have no intention of forcing anyone to do anything.
If I can figure it out, I’ll post the disconnection letter and the Freeloader Debt receipt, and anything else interesting.
I have yet to see a copy of my Suppressive Person Declare.
After this post I may not post much anymore. I have gotten to a crossroads where I want to focus on building the future. I felt a deep desire to communicate this story for others to know what they are getting/have gotten into. Please don’t take it as the only truth. Find the truth within yourself, take full responsibility for yourself. Examine everything, discard what doesn’t fit for you. Have the courage to say NO when you need to. You’ll be okay, really, you will!
Good Luck to you all,
Chris Eisenman
