Wow, I couldn't agree more!
I had been in the Sea Org for my teenage years. Before I turned 18, I figured that I would just go home on approved leave and not go back when I was expected to return.
I had gone into doubt on staying in the Sea Org before, but hated confessing it because the few times I had, I was just sent to Ethics to "handle" my bad deeds. I would get pulled off of my job and made to do manual labor and the rest of the staff looked at me like I was scum and didn't have an ounce of compassion for the fact that maybe I felt isolated and just missed my loving family.
Once I would get out of the state of doubt, everyone on staff loved me again and all was great!!!
Well, I couldn't take the isolation anymore. Every letter from my non-Scientology parents, would be opened with highlighted areas, that I should address. I would be pulled into Ethics to write a letter back to my parents telling them how happy I was and how my education and schooling was going great. (I wasn't even attending a school and when I did it would be one day a week). I was told that it is not lying if it is for the greatest good for our cause, and of course you are happy, you are one of the elite Sea Org members.
One time my mother had sent me money in a letter. I received the letter opened with no money. My mother called to see what I had bought with the money, and since there was somebody in the room with me on speaker phone, I had to say I got it and that I bought something with it. I didn't even know how much she sent so, it was hard making up what I bought.
When I went home on leave, I didn't return to the SO the day I was expected. The very next day there were two SO members who flew out to my location to retrieve me. I wasn't at home, but my little brother was. He said that the SO members were calling non stop and banging on the door. He was so frightened by them that he told them I had gone to the movies with my mom, just to get them to leave him alone.
There are two movie theaters in the area and I was at the big one. To my surprise, in the middle of the movie, there was a security guard with a flashlight shining it into peoples faces looking for me. The two sea Org members were with him and Identified me. He told me there was a family emergency (which was a lie they told him!)
I had to leave and so did my mom to talk to these Sea Org members there to retrieve me. I couldn't believe how they had found me. I didn't want to go back, but they talked my parents into letting me go back. They promised my parents it would only take two weeks for me to route out the proper and honorable way. A
few months later I was finally returned home.
My routing out process was just horrible and eventually ended with the CO spitting in my face when he could't talk me out of leaving. "Get this degraded being out of my office", he yelled to the 24 hour security guard watching me!
Wow, I had not thought about this in years!
-Evey